This morning I made myself a brew
Sat myself down to read the news
Someone said I'd been spotted nude
In Tesco's by the mangoes in an old pair of shoes

Apparently I've got a new tattoo
Don't like Ed Sheeran but I really do
Don't go believing all the lies they tell
'Cause the truth don't sell half as well

I'm hoping by tomorrow, I'll be yesterday's news
Got me in trouble with the missus for shit I didn't do
I need a miracle if there's a chance of making it through so
Please, please, give us the truth
I'm hoping by tomorrow I'll be yesterday's news
Got me on TV in a lawsuit for shit I didn't do
My face on the front page looking dazed and confused
Tomorrow, I'll be yesterday's news

My memory's bad at the best of times
So I question which one of these crimes
I really did or I did not
There are things I remember and things I forgot
There's a thing I do when I get mad
It's called burying my head in the sand
But there's just one thing that scares me to death
The whole thing blows over then blows back again

I'm hoping by tomorrow, I'll be yesterday's news
Got me in trouble with the missus for shit I didn't do
I need a miracle if there's a chance of making it through so
Please, please, give us the truth
I'm hoping by tomorrow I'll be yesterday's news
Got me on TV in a lawsuit for shit I didn't do
My face on the front page looking dazed and confused
Tomorrow, I'll be yesterday's news

The truth gets dull, the lies sell well
Click the link and wish me hell
Go on and judge me, have your laughs

I'm hoping by tomorrow, I'll be yesterday's news
Got me in trouble with the missus for shit I didn't do
My face on the front page looking dazed and confused
Tomorrow, I'll be yesterday's news